


'Morality'

by boredomsMuse



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Also called 'kails reaction to unsympathic patton', Gen, Sympathetic Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders, Sympathetic Deceit Sanders, Sympathetic Morality | Patton Sanders, unbetad because im lazy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-01-15
Packaged: 2021-02-27 08:06:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,069
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22263826
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/boredomsMuse/pseuds/boredomsMuse
Summary: The sides can change, they all know that.  Virgil's changed, the twins have changed, Deceit has changed, Logan has changed.Patton has changed.
Relationships: Morality | Patton Sanders & Deceit Sanders
Comments: 7
Kudos: 75





	'Morality'

**Author's Note:**

> You know, I was thinking - when you're a kid your sense of morality is largely just what other people tell you is right and wrong. 
> 
> Anyway that's what bore this fic

Things had been better in the mindscape lately. Thomas had accepted all his sides which meant no more barriers. No more rooms in dark, untouched corners. Finally, everyone was together and they were a family. A big, chaotic but wonderful family.

Most of the time, Patton could believe that.

Sitting on the edge of Thomas’ mind, staring out into the subconscious, Patton wasn’t in the mood to pretend. Things had been better lately, but there still weren’t perfect. Especially not where he was concerned.

“Why would they be?” He muttered to himself. “Things wouldn’t need to be better if not for you. Gee, you really messed things up _morality_.”

“It’s rare to hear you call yourself that.” Patton jumped at the new voice. He relaxed a little when he saw it was only Logan, standing in the door and looking at him with a small frown. “Am I correct in assuming that means you’re upset?”

“Oh I’m alright.” Patton assured, forcing a grin. He dropped the grin when Logan rose an eyebrow. “I guess I’m just…” He trailed off, not sure how to explain the bubbling feelings in his stomach. 

“Feeling guilty for things you didn’t do?” Logan worded it for him and Patton shrugged.

“I did technically do them.” Patton mumbled. “I am Morality.”

“But you haven’t always been. Just as I haven’t always been Logic.” Logan argued. He took a seat next to Patton, though his legs remained firmly crossed on the balcony not hanging over it. 

“Learning and Logic aren’t so different.” Patton claimed.

“That isn’t what I meant.” Logan said. 

“I know.” Patton sighed. “But it’s different. Curiosity was barely around a few minutes before he spilt into you and-” He cut himself off abruptly, turning his head away. He couldn’t say that name. He didn’t have a right to say that name.

“Yes, Morality was around for a much more specific amount of time.” Logan accepted. “But that is really the only difference.”

“Curiosity didn’t hurt anyone.” Patton muttered. 

“I’m rather sure we hurt the cat.” Logan claimed. “Do you hold a grudge about that?”

“It’s not the same Logan!” Patton snapped, turning his head to glare at Logan. The movement, or maybe the anger, caught Logan off guard and Patton immediately looked away again. He wiped his eyes, trying to clear the water and the glare from them. “Morality torn King in two, and banished Deceit and Remus.”

“Yes. Morality did that.” Logan said and even though Patton knew it wasn’t coming he waited for the anger. Anger like Deciets, cold and cruel, or Anger like Remus’, fearful and bitter. Of course neither came, not from Logan. “It wasn’t you.”

“I am Morality.” Patton reminded.

“You weren’t then.” Logan argued. 

“I might as well have been.” Patton huffed. “We were one in the same, really. And he was what I was meant to become.” 

“But you didn’t.” Logan said. With no argument for that, Patton stayed silent. Eventually, Logan sighed and stood. “I think you should tell Deceit the truth.” 

“He wouldn’t believe me.” Patton argued, like he had every other time Logan brought this up.

“Falsehood.” Logan said. “I don’t believe you are scared he won’t believe you. I think you are… punishing yourself, because you believe you are guilty and so you are allowing him to believe you are because you think that is what you deserve. But that too, is a falsehood.” Patton could only stare for a moment, surprised he’d been so… called out. 

“I didn’t know you were so good at reading emotions.” He said when he finally got over his shook.

“Yes, well, I suppose it was bound to rub off eventually.” Logan said, clearing his throat.

“I guess I’ll think about talking to Deceit.” Patton agreed, even knowing he likely wouldn’t. Unfortunately, Logan seemed to see right through him.

“Patton, please.” He said. “Morality hurt you too, in ways Deceit will understand much better than I can.” 

“He didn’t hurt me Logan.” Patton practically whispered, pulling his knees to his chest. 

“Falsehood.” Logan’s own response was soft and shortly followed by the sound of the logical side walking off. Sighing, Patton tried to push the word away. Morality hadn’t hurt him, not really. Not compared to how he hurt them.

* * *

A few hours later, Patton heard someone approaching once more. Patton took a deep breath and forced a smile onto his face, hoping his eyes weren’t too puffy, before he turned to face them. He was expecting Logan once more, or maybe Virgil who had a talent for sensing negative emotions. Instead, his smile dropped as he saw Deceit in the doorway.

“Logan doesn’t seem to think you have something to tell me.” The side said, looking down at his nails like he was entirely uninterested. “I’ve never known you were a liar, but I thought you bothered keeping things from me.” Apparently Logan hadn’t trusted him to talk to Deceit on his own terms then.

“Um…” Patton tried to find his words but came up empty. What was he meant to do now? He couldn’t actually… he _couldn’t_ tell Deceit. But wasn’t it wrong to keep this from him? Or was it right to let Deceit have someone to blame? It didn’t take long for Patton to spiral himself around, debating the wrongs and rights and only getting more confused. 

“Morality?” Deceit frowned, looking up to find… well, honestly to find a mess. Tears streamed down Patton’s face, his whole body was shaking, and little sniffles and hiccups escaped his mouth. 

“I’m _not_.” Patton managed through hiccups, shaking his head hard. “I wasn’t, not back then.” Despite elbroating, Deceit was no less confused. 

“What do you mean?” He asked, stepping forward. Patton tried to explain but his words came out too jumbled with sobs and gasps as everything he’d bottled up for so long finally boiled over. Pushing aside his questions for the moment, Deceit knelt in front of Patton. “Patton, you need to breath.” He said, lies gone from his voice. “Can you breathe with me?” Patton managed to nod and as Deceit started to count out his breaths, Patton listen. In for four, hold for seven, out for eight. Slowly but surely, Patton’s breaths evened out and he got his tears under control.

“I’m sorry.” Patton mumbled, wiping his eyes. 

“You can’t make it up to me by explaining what you were saying before.” Deceit said, sitting back a little further now that Patton seemed alright. The glasses wearing side hesitated a moment, biting his bottom lip, before nodding.

“Well, um, you know how we can change right?” Patton started.

“Of course not. I’ve always been Deceit.” The scaled side hissed, making Patton flinch. Sighing, Deceit schooled his expression. “Sorry, continue.” He instructed.

“When Thomas was born I was just his Heart.” Patton mumbled. “Just his emotions. The was only me and Instincy back then, until... until Morality came. He wasn’t like us, he didn’t look like Thomas and he was much, much older. He told me I’d take his place one day, and that until there he had to teach me. And then… it was like we merged but without really merging. I guess it was more like I was watching the world from his head.”

“There was a different Morality?” Deceit frowned. “And only Instinct knew?” 

“At first, but… well, when Thomas would get very emotional it was like I took over.” Patton tried to explain. “Logan and, and King, they meet me a few times. Apparently I looked completely different as me and not, not him.”

“What happened to him?” Deceit asked. 

“I don’t know.” Patton admitted. “It was like he faded. I started noticing I had more and more control over his body and then one morning he was just… gone. Logan said it was because Thomas had his own morality now, that when he was little Thomas just accepted what adults said was right and wrong but he didn’t do that anymore.”

“I don’t see…” Deceit frowned. Patton waited as the other processed the information, growing more nervous with each passing second. Would Deceit still blame him? “Why didn’t you tell me?” Deceit finally broke the silence.

“Well…” Patton mumbled before sighing and forcing himself to continue. “I didn’t like what Morality did to you, or to King but I… I wasn’t sure how to argue with him. Even when he was gone. It took me a long time to realize he wasn’t always right. And then I thought it was too late. You hated me, and I don’t know if we’ll ever be able to get King back. So I just… I thought maybe it was better to let you keep being mad at me. That way at least you had someone to be mad at.” He admitted, almost entirely in one breath.

“Is that what you wanted? For me to be mad at you?” Deceit didn’t even blink an eye at the quick speech, perhaps because he was so used to it with Remus.

“Of course not!” Patton said. “But wasn’t it better for you to be mad at someone who was still here?” 

“But what about what you want?” Deceit asked, frowning.

“What about what I want?” Patton frowned right back. 

“I’ve decided I don’t believe you.” Deceit sighed, pushing himself back to lay on the balcony. For a minute, Patton’s heart stopped and then he realized Deceit was lying. “You know, your allowed to want things.” 

“I do want things!” Patton argued.

“And I can’t spot a lie when I hear one.” Deceit rolled his eyes. Patton opened his mouth to argue but stopped. Now that Deceit had pointed it out, he couldn’t remember the last time he really went for something he wanted. At least not for himself. Huh. When had that started?

But even as he wondered it, Patton knew. How often had Morality scolded him for wanting something? For wanting to talk to Logan, or play pretend with King. For wanting to be his own person that wasn’t tied to Morality.

For wanting Thomas to have whatever made him happy, even when he shouldn’t. Just like Desire.

But Patton had already decided Morality was wrong about Desire, about Deceit. Did that mean he was wrong about Patton too?

“I want to be friends.” Patton said, firmly and irrationally fearing a Morality that was long gone. “All of us.”

“I don’t want that too.” Deceit said. He patted the spot next to him and Patton, grinning, laid down.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.” Patton said.

“I’m not sorry you had to share a head with that jerk.” Deceit huffed. “That sounds delightful.”

“It wasn’t too bad. He was just… very static and set in his ways… okay, it was pretty bad.” Patton gave in. For a while they just stared up at the sky of Thomas’ mind. It had been a long time since Patton had stared at these stars, a mixture of constellations that Logan had learnt by heart, and constellations King had thought were better than reality. Remus and Roman hadn’t touched them since they came to be, Patton wasn’t sure they knew they could.

“I want to see King again I miss him.” He admitted. He’d never admitted that before, not even to himself. “But I don’t want to lose the twins.”

“I can’t relate.” Deceit sighed. “I don’t hope that one day, it might happen.”

“One day.” Patton nodded. There had been working together a lot lately, and Thomas had accepted that his imagination was more than either of them alone. They’d just have to see where that led.

“You know… if we’re not friends,” Deceit started some time later, “then you cannot call me Dante.” Patton shot up with a gasp, grinning ear to ear as he looked over. Deceit was staring off somewhere else, face flushed.

“Did you just tell me what I think you did?!” He asked, almost bouncy.

“No.” Deceit, _Dante_ , confirmed.

“That’s so cool!” He grinned. 

“Just, definitely tell everyone because I am certainly ready for them all too know.” Dante mumbled.

“I won’t, I promise... Dante.” Patton swore, unable to keep the grin off of his face for more than a moment. 

“I definitely haven’t made a mistake.” Dante huffed as Patton laid back down again. It did nothing to curb Patton’s grin. Those words didn’t sound like a lie.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally it was going to be about Heart meeting Morality and like a step but step of his involvement but i didn't like how that was going and so we have this.
> 
> Let me know if you want to see King in this universe. [And if you liked my writing, check my out on instagram. I'm launching a patreon for my writing soon and that's where you'll hear about it first.](https://www.instagram.com/kailsmusings/)


End file.
